OKAY I HAVE TO START THIS OFF WITH TWO THINGS ....
THIS IS NOT EDITED?!!!! DO NOT READ UNLESS YOU WANT TO HEAR ABOUT ALL THE DETAILS
alsoooo ... i named my computer journal earl ... there are references to him
also also also ... thailand is like trashy party central ... do not judge ... i did not go out really in any other country but thailand
Sa Wa Dee Cap Eletronic Journal!!!
Well well well Thailand … they should really call it GREATland …haha….okay yeah lame I know okay well à okay well the first day in thailand was serious travel like a two hour bus ride and to Bangkok where there are some sweet pictures of me tracey and joe being “astonished” by Bangkok hahah anyways we ate lunch there it was wicked good but I HAD SOME REALLY WEIRD STUFF!!! like this lil pink square thing that tasted like boogers and this gummy thing that was terrible ughh EWW NASTY it was shaped like a heart but it was rea;llllyyy sshiitt well then we went to this airport where we HAD LIKE THIRTY minutes to get to our plane!!! But the airport was wicked cool it was phenom it had these sweet moving sidewalks they were level, then went down, then level out it was so so so cool!!!!! And well we flew and hahah it was sooooo funnnyyyyy okay soo like I will say tracey was very scared sooo earl we each bought 2 beers and walked around the airport hahaha and we looked like such idiots when we tried to get into where our gate was and it was behind like this glass gate with this little black box infront of it and the gate was locked and me and joe were like do we scan our tickets infront of the black box and like were trying to open the gate we legit looked like idiots with two beers in our hands trying scan our tickets when the entrance was too the left HAHAHH EARL YOU WOULD HAVE DIED…. Anywayss… to phuket tracey was so scared of flying and me and joe had to calm her ahahha it was hysterical every little shake made her scared!! Hahahah ohh nervous flyers!!! Well then we went to our hotel which was so sweet and HERE WE GO JOURNAL, EARL okay so well we went out and we went a lil crazy let me tell ya Earl hahahahah ohh …and here … we….go ( read like heath ledger in batman) anyways okay so well we all started to get crunky in my hotel room and I mean about like 8 of us…HYSTERICAL and then we left and I was pretty crunk there Earl … actually very….so then we got into a rickshaw and I talked that guy down because he was SOOO over charging and we went to this place called club bananas where they were going to make us pay cover charge when there was like 18 of us I was like no….so we did not and then this si wehre the group split everyone left us and it was whatever I did not care and anyways so me joe tracey Allison dana and molly asked this thai women where we could get alcohol cheap and she walked us to the grocery store and it was soooo nice even tho it was a block it was wicked nice for someone to just go out of their way form selling stuff and just like ya know walk us to a grocery store….anywaysyssyys so we get there and we buy a bottle of vodka worst choice ever hahah anywasys sooooOSOOSOSOSOSO we get the bottle and I was like is it legal to dirnk on the street and the women was like YEAHHHH and if someone gives you a problem tell them to talk to me!!! So that was SWEET I got thai backkk hahah yes so anyways we are drinking it on the street and I am like getting durnk ahhaha ohh well well I ahha met about 6+ locals that ngiht and talked to all of them…some where shop owners and when people went to their stores later that day they asked if I was gonna come to their shop later hahahah!!!! Well some people got scared of me some people embraced me it was soooo funny hahah so well APARENTLY we walked back to the hotel and we changed I left off cell phone, camera, Mauritius necklace and well I don’t rememeber this more on this later well anyway we walk to the beach and Earl…like Sage said, John the doctors wife, that semester at sea makes everyone take off their cloths and she was right people just want to get naked on semester at sea…welll so then we swam around naked for like about 2 hours me tracey and joe but other people where there but me tracey and joe stayed the longest and were the last!! Ahahh and we were jumping all over each other and swimming and it was wicked fun!!! and something touched my leg and that was scary but whatever…so then everyones clothes disappear except for mine so I dish out my cloths I only got the shirt joe got the shorts and tracey got the white undershirt…unfortunately everything was hanging out fo this shirt and these thai men like offered me a jacket apparently to wrap around my waist and like drive me home on their motorcycle whih I said no to because well yeahh no motocycles anywaysysysysy I walk home naked and then I was like shit where is my camera cell phone everything and I am up all night trying to find the stuff and my roommate zack would not wake up and we only had one key which sucked so I had to sleep outside on the ground and the guy would not let me into my room because I told 4 other rooms that were not my rooms were my room I mean there where 9000 rooms it was kinda hard to rememeber anywayyss so I slept on te ground outside but it was like 6 in the morning so whatever but rene let me into her room so I could sleep on the floor in the ac which was ncie and I woke up like naked in a towel hahah anywasy then we woke up and of course I was very tired because well it was only one hour of sleep and we woke up and drove two hours to where this elephant village was and we got to ride ELEPHANTSS!!! But when we got their there was a baby monkey!!! It was soo cute and he was jumping all over us….he me and like ran up my LEGG!!! And he went up my shorts and I was like AHAHHAHAH MONKEY IN MY PANTS LITERALLYY and then “a” our trip person she was like “he thinks theres a banana up there” hahahah ohhhhh A…earl I think you would have liked her…she was single hahah …. Anyways sooo like the monkey jumped all over me and like jumped on my face and like in my mouth and like played with my hair and it was scary and awesome he was like a little human and he would jump onto a leg a of a girl and would just hug her leg and sit there like a little baby like it was her mama and everyone was clearly win you are the papa and the monkey would just jump and jump and he would touch you…HIS HANDS HIS HANDS WERE just like ours and he would just hold yours and it was sooo awesome!!! OI (go in thai) so we rode the elephant and the main way they got the elephant to move was OI!!! Hahah and we rode up this place and there are wild tigers there and all I could think of was the YOUTUBE video!!! Where the tiger comes out fo the bush and GRABS THE MAN OFF THE ELEPHANT SOSOSOSO I was like shit shit hsitt I don’t wanan get eaten because EARL I don’t know if you rmemeber but like there are three animals that view humans as prey: crocs, polar bears, and TIGERS!!!! Learned that from CAZ….earl rememeber caz??!?!?!? Soo I was scared!!! Hahah anwyays the elephant was WICKED COOL but I felt kinda bad making it carry me up like hills and rocks and mini-waterfalls like throu a jungle!!! I felt wicked bad but the palce did save the elephants frommm a logging company!!! So that was good … but then we went to this BEAUTIFUL PLACEE!!! Earl you would have loved it!!!!! Like we went into this little raft and like this man paddled us around this river that was in the middle of a jungle with all these wicked cool water bugs that skimmed across the water!!! But anyways this man would paddle us around this beautiful jungle with HUGE HUGE LIMESTONE mountains I tell ya EARL the limeston mountains where huge very organic formed and white they were absolutely breath taking!!!! I loved it was was so so so so so relaxing!!!! ( WARNING TRASHY STARTS HERE?!!!! - skip to other red words) Well anywasy we went back to the hotel and met up with everyone and went out to dinner and like then this where Phuket got weird but not really okay first of all there are hookers everywhere and they would grab you and taunt you and it was funny but also sad but more funny hahaha and then we went to a bird show….earl I want to spare you this but I don’t know if I can this was gross and I was 100% sober okay well this girl we walked into this place and we sat down and these girl started putting shit up her couche some people thought it was hysterical I thought it was crazy weird earl we are talking … BIRDS….ping pong balls, bananas, RODENTS, openening coca cola bottles, RAZOR BLADES, a string of 40+ lays … it was scaring to say the least but whatever… (TRASHY ENDS HERE)then the next day we went on this boat and it took us to these beautiful islands like literally it looked like god grabbed some sand from underneigh the ground and pulled them up they were beautiful anyways soo we get to this island called james bond island and like it is where they filmed a part of james bond movie like an old one and then me tracey and joe took a james bond piture inspired by these Asians that we saw doing it … hahah super fun…. and then we took the boat to this other place where me tracey and joe got into this boat paddled by this man and literally he pattled us through all these islands and we would have to go under like the islands and literally the gaps were so small Earl that me tracey and joe would have to lie down into each others croches which could have been awkward except that we were all over each other two nights ago making it okay hahahah and so we would travel though and under all these crazy rocks and stuff it was soooo INTENSELY AWESOMEE and we picked up these horseue crabs and put them on our faces hahah sooo funnn!!!! Anywayysysysys we were leaving and he took us under another one and like sometimes the rocks were so tight that you would have to deflate the kayak and stuff and pull your way through and so like I touched the top of the rocks and he SCREAMEDD “NO TOUCH!!!!!” and I was like jeez okay hahah but it was hystericalll anywayysysysysysysy sooo Earl we got back to the hotel and we were all wicked zonked and I felt sick and unfortunately I was throwing up all night with food poising ... and those 4 jumbo mcdonalds fries did not make stuff come up easier .... which was terrible so I did not to get to go out for st pattys day but whatever…. Anywaysss I am kinda glad I did not go out because me and joe were talking about getting matching tattoos on our asses and he did get one!!!! Of the tiger on the thai beer hahah and welll if I went out I probs would have a tiger tattooed to my ass which would suckkk hahahah whateverrrr but I am still wanna see if he wants to get matching Mario kart players on our asses hahaha in some other country hahahah I think we should I will recommend it to him today hahah hahah anyways then we flew to Bangkok and Earl guess who was there ?!?!?!!? GIGI … I did not know when when I knew gigi but gigi was a foreign exchange student from Bangkok sophmore year in high school… I am soo pumped to see her like 5 years later it was nutzoooo and then she took me out to dinner and than we went to this thai club wehre there made me buy socks with my boat shoes b.c I was dressed disgracefully apparently not wearing socks … anywaysysysysy the place was literally jam packed with ALL THAI people I was the only American there and it was soooo much fun because most of the music was thai music tooo and let me tell ya Earl they loved them some American those thai peopole hahahah it was soo fun and I met all of gigis friends none of whos names I could pronounce or rememeber but they were all sooo nice too me I wish I could rmemeehr their names but I have a lot of pics with them and then trish nate and Claire came and they were all so happy to meet gigi and her thai friends and vice versa and we were the only Americans in the place I MEAN WE WERE CELEBS people were taking our picture and asking us to be in pics with them and buying us drinks being soo nice and they were all like we need to welcome you to our country and kept buying us all sorts of drinks it was so so so so so nice I loved it and had a lot of fun….i miss gigi… and then the next day we woke up soooo early and Claire had to sleep in my room because she did not have a place to stay and that night I woke up because joe jumped on Claire and accidentally slammed his elbow like in my tailbone so I woke up with an elbow in my ass … it was painful ahhah anywaysysysys we went to the royal palace the next day and while it was beautiful it was unworldly hot and I was legit sweating everywhere hahahah hahah and we took pictures with the guards who could not move like the ones in london it was fun and we saw the jade budah which was like really pretty and very important but nobody told me why…sorry earl I willl inform you later and the palace had all these gold statues and really beautiful things…the pics describe it better than I can in words anywaysss that pretty much wraps up Thailand… WAIT just kidding we went to this tiger village which was terrible earl it was so despressing they treated the tigers so poor and there were so many in like so little space and they just bred them to put them into cages it made me really sad that I was leaving Thailand which is such a phenom country on that note but I did and it was sad but I did get to hold a tiger so that was cool but they were kinda mean to it soo that was really sadd but I will just have to call peta and be like listen you need to go here those tigers are being terribly treated and need to be released like the park had no interntions of raising the population and releasing them into the wild nothing like that they just drug them up and let tourist hold cubs … its wicked sad. L Later earl….il miss ya buddy going to china tommorow YAY!!!

